#169771 - I stood up took her into my arms just holding her like I was keeping her from falling to pieces literally as much I was metaphorically and whispered to her “it’s not that I don’t want you I just know it’s wrong for me to have you. I thought back to the last few months before my parents officially divorced just after my 17th birthday not the sad parts but what had changed between my sister(16 years old at the time) and I, when everything fell apart we had become much closer than ever and if I’m being perfectly honest we alienated almost all our friends they just couldn’t understand us anymore but now that she was basically the most important person to me how did I just start living without her. The rest of that night was horrible I was able to sleep with the pills but when I did I had a nightmare one that I didn’t remember when I woke up but still terrified me.